daaaaaaaaaddyyyyyyy!!! kill it!!!!

remember the good ol days? the days of lying in terror in your bed with the worlds HUGEST BLACKEST BUG crawling in the corner of your room? and all you had to do was start yelling "dddddddddaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaddddddyyyyyyyy!!!!" and dad would come running and kill it?
well, okay, fine, ill admit, that wasnt exactly how things went in my house. it was more me yelling, and my father telling me that he'd get there eventually and to stop yelling and to get over it.
whatever. regardless, he'd kill it. hell, he was still killing bugs for me when i was living at home at age 24.
living on my own has presented some problems. wait. scratch that. living alone in a new apartment that has not been effectively cleaned like my student housing was has presented some problems.
my mains problems have been mosquitos. no, i dont have air conditioning. or screens. essentially, i am a free buffet to mosquitos. tonight....oh jesus tonight. tonight is the night that a friggin CRICKET decided to come into my apartment.
now, maybe i havent been clear. i live in effing BROOKLYN. there isnt "nature" anywhere around here. and, i live on teh FOURTH FLOOR. what in the h-e-double hockey sticks was a cricket doing flying this high? well, i suppose they live in the tree outside my apartment.....whatever.
so, he flies in, and i spent a good ten minutes with a cup in one out-stretched arm, my face turned away trying to humanely capture the thing and throw it out the window. after MANY girly yells, i caught him.....sadly, as i tried to move him, i ripped off a couple legs and a wing.....i TRIED TO KEEP HIM ALIVE!!!
however, now i think nature is punishing me. i have been dive-bombed by the world's hugest fly for teh past ten minutes since i killed the cricket.

daaaaaddyyyyyy!!!!!!! come kill the bugs....